Sunday, March 09, 2003

God is in control.

It's interesting to note that both Denise and Kareem MSN talked today about God having a special plan for everyone. Denise focused more on the plan itself, which is different for everyone, and Kareem MSN focused more on the hardships we go through in life that make us stronger and God ultimately using that to fulfill his plans. He gave a cool example about his family -- how when he was a little kid that his parents were on the verge of a divorce, and they had to move from their suburban home to a place in the countryside. After a while they came to America, and they all started attending a church. Kareem MSN's father was not a christian, but God worked in his life and showed him the truth, which led to him accepting Christ. He's now an elder at his church. If Kareem MSN's parents had never gone through all that trouble and hardship, they probably would have never come to America, and therefore his family would not have been saved.

The message made me reflect back on my life. If my parents were still together, I wouldn't be here right now -- I'd still be in Korea. Would I still be a christian? Even after their divorce, as a kid, if I hadn't gone through all that crap with that woman and my dad, would I have agreed to come here to be with my mom? Probably not...

Very interesting how things work out. But I'm not totally satisfied. I mean, is that all really worth it? Do I really have a better life here? Is knowing God worth all that?

I want to believe that He has a special plan for me. I want to believe that there's a purpose in my life. I want to believe that I wasn't just put here on Earth to suffer.

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